Posts by lyicx

  • What events would you like to see?

    ↩  RedEastWood my exact words were

    Quote

    "i'd stay well away from miniSMP for a while longer if you want to preserve your sanity
    just saying"

    i dont give a shit enough to gatekeep it, but personally i'd rather everyone waited before the scene cools the fuck down again. not that i have an actual fucking say anymore

  • the times come.

    hi again

    im just really letting you all know that i cant do this ECM shit anymore. this is an actual resignation. that includes Hub Mod and Senior admin as i dont really have the urge to go ingame anymore. if its fine with wild1145 and simplynick, i would not mind retaining forum/discord mod as i still check them fairly frequently enough


    i feel like after this and the lack of how many people dont fuckin listen and a very vocal minority that expects some sort of result is not faring well with my mental. i put all my cards on the table and i've got barely fuck all to show for it. that and i've become slowly more disconnected from a lot of people and would rather move on. with the way my real life is going i've got other things to be worrying about and i dont want this to be another one of the factors of stress i got to contend with


    im sorry its come to this, personally thought it'd be a good thing throughout but well given how this server is like, being an executive is fucking irritating and its not because of the upper management. yes i lost steam around october-november time and has been something i've been contemplating for awhile. then i tried to get back into it and get absolutely spat on. i was going to resign on December 6th aswell but the atmosphere then just kinda made me rethink. i really wish i didn't now. i drafted a full on essay for this shit but thought twice and the shit after christmas till now has not been very good


    ill put the draft i made a few months ago in a pastebin or some shit for you all to see since like i dont know how to spoiler it since its a whole ass post long (actual pastebin gets funny about my text so heres a "hastebin") https://hastebin.skyra.pw/raw/efiqabuhul


    im really fuckin depressed as shit and i might initially regret this call after a minute but fuck, it might actually be for the best. im not what i was a few years back and i dont fucking think im on the top of anyones high lists anymore so yeah. 👋

  • Mentally Unstable Checks - January 2022

    yeah this one is also a bit late. was mostly due to this and not getting round to it, apologies https://forum.totalfreedom.me/…-current-issues-with-plan


    we do have a bit of data loss, i dont want to let it simmer anymore because people will get funny because executives must give life and limb to server and dedicate their whole lives just so someone doesn't cry about it. that and it would fuck my pattern, its already getting a bit fucked anyhow


    Anti95 - 3d 21h
    cursedsteve777 - 3d 18h (i do not know your discord)
    ev3rage - 2d 19h
    TheRedX - 2d 17h (bro)
    riawo - 2d 16h
    snpa - 2d 8h
    Tizz91 - 2d 2h
    xPkz     - 2d 12m
    Aeluraydak - 1d 19h
    matscalle - 1d 18h (bro x2)

  • demoralization

    hey.


    so yesterdays event it really didn't go the way i hoped it would've. fuck i dont even know how to start writing this shit other than "i told you so" that it'd be an utter shitshow. but you know i dont feel like im being fucking listened to the majority of the time and its driving me fucking mental.


    you all wonder why there was a lack of activity in the ECM and bitch about it for ages and then when i go put in the effort to go bigger with this its thrown right in my fucking face. and those who bitch about it aint even fuckin taking note that i've actually fucking tried here. myself and the mb's and a few others that put hours into making this map and the original idea me and matscalle pitched as he kept suggesting things akin to miniSMP and i knew i had to do something about the suggestion so we decided to go all in on one event. always wanted an underground like concept for miniSMP and thought it'd be a neat twist. you all literally had two weeks to tell me it wasn't a good fucking idea, i put out a fuckin trailer to showcase some of the map and now it comes round i hear shit about it being quite fuckin mixed.


    another thing i would like to point out is the whole "This event is ruined for me" type shit. i hate seeing that. i cannot tell you how bad of a feeling it is to see peoples experience get ruined and leave something you put a lot into. yeah those people who did that are banned now and wont be coming back.


    matscalles performance, a lot of people was not happy with and i certainly fucking wasn't. some of the shit he was saying after i flipped the map over to a void world because i was pissed fuckin got to me and went against me for awhile which left a sour taste in my mouth. this impulsive decision especially https://forum.totalfreedom.me/d/3705-event-poll which is why i denied his app. if this event continues, he wont be an official part of it


    i guess what im trying to say is, i dont know if i want to keep going with this event. im so fucking demoralized to continue by peoples attitudes but also feel forced to or its back to bitching about the lack of anything else wondering why. ill have a think about it over the next few hours. i just want people to understand my perspective on yesterday because i feel like im talking to a brick fuckin wall a lot of the time and its driving me mental

  • Matscalle - Event Host

    Quote

    ↩ @'wxtermelon' Just a small notice that in a few hours time, this application will have been open for 2 months.

    2 months too long


    denied. your competence needs work when being part of something like this, spontaneously making polls, causing shit after a map switch over and your general maturity in the group chat. really cant say i haven't given you a chance


    you may have another attempt in 90 or so days.